HOW TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR RELATIONSHIP BEFORE INFIDELITY
Do you reckon that infidelity is a topic for couples in crisis? Well, not at all. This is one of the myths of infidelity. It is true that in a high percentage infidelity happens when the relationship does not work or when “it is pulling “. However, couples who work have also experienced episodes of infidelity. Curious, right? You will ask: Why infidelity if the relationship works? Infidelity has more to do with desire (than with sex). In our society they do not stop us from machine-gunning in that we must pursue the desire; and thus we are more sensitive to becoming puppets of pleasure. Satisfying a desire instantly makes life easier for us at that time, but we are not free from its consequences (guilt, distrust …). Note: Although we are at a time when it is easier to be unfaithful, so is “being caught”. Also, learn how can a proper communication help you improve your relationship?
This phenomenon is a topic that we must openly address with the couple. Take for granted that because everything works is not going to happen, it is not the solution. As in other issues, a couple must agree on the commitment of loyalty and define the limits of their relationship. Each couple chooses and openly exposes their limits, since there are different reasons that can lead to infidelity; and different ways of being unfaithful. For example; the most common motives in men are boredom and the fear of intimacy; and those of women; the desire for intimacy and the feeling of loneliness (feeling alone in the relationship). Just as, for men, infidelity related to sex is the most common, and for a woman it is the emotional (flirt, seduce …).
What can you do to take care of your relationship with Infidelity?
1. Talk about your needs. It is important that your relationship meets your expectations to a large extent and needs of each other to continue feeling that it makes sense to “be together.”
2. Feed the desire. Desire is not synonymous with “casual” relationships. Long-term couples spend times when members experience more or less desire, but safety (of a relationship) and desire are not at odds.
3. Learn to talk and listen to differences. The fun is to complement them when they pursue similar values; despite being differences .
4. Manage conflicts as a team. Do not let the conflict distance you or wait for it to be solved by magic.
5. Put limits on yourself in situations where someone appeals to you or who you could fall in love with.
6. Give value to what you have built together; and get involved in the relationship. Creating solid bonds is what allows us to enjoy our relationships.
7. Accept that infidelity is a phenomenon that is happening and must be addressed. Make the allegiance pact explicitly.
8. Stop to evaluate how the relationship is and if it works in its most essential areas: affectivity / sexuality, intimacy, feel team and feel care and care.
Many of the couples who have gone through episodes of infidelity survive, but you have to see how they do it in order to regain confidence. It is one of the most complicated issues to handle in the life of a couple and threatens emotional security. Professional help is recommended if with your resources it is not enough to overcome it. Well treated; if it is exceeded; It can be the opportunity to talk about your fears and vulnerabilities and learn to express your needs.